So why am I even doing reverb10? Do I really need somebody to help me reflect and manifest? That really is what this blog's more serious posts are about. What am I doing? Is it working for me? What's the next step? I don't need the prompts, but I like them. Not because they're something new but because using them I've made a commitment to writing. It's like when you make an agreement to exercise with a friend instead of just the Wii fit time piggie bank. I've told all five of you that still read this blog that I'm doing this so now I have to get back in the blogging game.
How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in yourself in the last year?
At first I had a really hard time with this question. I felt like just throwing my hands up in the air and saying "I didn't- unless you mean wondering about just how many fucking pedophiles are out there after listening to the stories of the girls I work with". To me a sense of wonder requires a certain amount of openness and faith that there are good and wonderful things in this world which can be really hard to maintain if you have a work schedule that means you rarely see the light of day and are working with teenage addicts. Tell me, where's the wonder in that?
So I looked back. I realized I started off the year in a different place. For the first half of the year, even after I started working graveyards I really was trying to be more positive and open, to notice the little things. Before I moved into town I let myself be awe struck by the beauty of the country roads I've driven on for years. I put a lot of focus on to maintaining relationships, seeing my friends regularly and the sense of fulfillment and joy I got from doing so. I wrote about the ridiculousness of everything, in a good way.
I'm really hoping that moving to a "day" shift will allow me to bring a little of this back. I'll still be working with kids with some pretty shitty life stories but I'm hoping my new school schedule will make more time for friends and I'll be destressing a little better on my days off.
Song for this posts title:
Song for funsies:
I have no idea why those are showing up as downloads instead of using the typepad player but I don't have time to figure it out right now.